what do you like to do for fun?

Asking someone "What do you like to do for fun?" is a fairly common question. But to be perfectly honest, it's a question that used to terrify me. What do I say? What's the right answer? I don't do anything that's cool. What hobbies do I have? 

Paralyzed by the fear of being judged I didn't know how to answer. I felt trapped in a corner unable to breath every time the question was posed to me. My perfectionist tendencies made me think that I had to "be good" at fun. Whatever the hell I thought that meant.
The undue pressure I put on myself that who I was and what I liked wasn't good enough made me think that I had to be perfect at an activity or hobby for it to count as something I "liked to do for fun".

I'm here to tell myself and everyone else that I've learned that you are only failing at fun if you don't try. Everyone has different life circumstances, interests, and demands on their time. Seasons in our lives leave more or less time for recreational activities or cultivating hobbies.

A lot of my past uneasiness came from guilt that I wasn't a fun person or doing enough fun activities in my life. The reality is that day-to-day life and responsibilities do take up a majority of my time. But that doesn't mean I can't make time to have fun or find ways to enjoy my daily activities.

Having fun isn't about being perfect or impressive by worldly standards. You don't have to have a ton of money or copious amounts of free time to have fun. It's about finding joy in the journey and carving out time in our busy lives to cultivate our individual worth and personal relationships.

I thought I had a full plate when I was single and then I became a wife and stepmom. Between work, church service, keeping up with the house, and traveling to visit the boys every month making time for fun is sometimes an afterthought. 

Is something still fun if you have to intentionally set aside time to do it (aka put it on my Google Calendar)? YES!!!!! Everyone's version of "fun" is different. And fun is experienced in varying degrees from going on a Target run with your partner to jetting off on a luxurious vacation.

By definition, an activity or action that is fun brings you enjoyment and/or amusement. So maybe a better question to ask is "What brings you enjoyment in life?"

Here are some common things I like to do for fun that bring me enjoyment:

  • Going out to eat at my favorite spots
  • Trying new restaurants and cuisines
  • Watching baseball and going to baseball games with my husband
  • Hunting for bargains at Marshall's and TJ Maxx
  • Going to the farmers' market with my husband and dog
  • Spending time with my husband and stepsons (it honestly doesn't matter what we're doing)
Other activities that I don't do as often as I'd like but still bring me enjoyment when I am able to do them:
  • Exploring new sites and shops in Albuquerque
  • Traveling to discover news places and to visit family and friends
  • Going to concerts of musical artists I like
  • Learning how to cook or bake a new recipe
  • Reading a good book
Fun isn't nearly as complicated as I used to make it. As an adult it does require some work. But I'm good at having fun simply by trying. There's no letter grade or trophy to win. If I enjoy my life and my family enjoys our life then I'm doing alright.

I've made the decision to no longer let "what do you do for fun?" be a loaded question with the ability to rend me powerless. I create my own definition. Who I am and what I like make me worthy of fun in all of its forms. 

So, what do you like to do for fun? ;-)

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